ONE OF the world's cleverest women is Maxine Lapiduss, who gave so much as a writer/producer in the early years of "Roseanne." She has touched many other shows with her magic-including "Ellen"-- and boasts none other than Katherine Hepburn in her corner as a mentor. You can catch Lapiduss on September 27 at the Globe Playhouse in West Hollywood, when she returns to her stand-up comedy roots. Maxine's one-woman show is about her life in crime/television (same thing?)